Dating: it’s not a race to get into a relationship

Dating: it’s not a race to get into a relationship

Let's say that over a five-week period, you have six amazing dates with a new man in your life.

Things look promising.

You enjoy each other's company, share common interests, talk on the phone or exchange emails most days, and the mutual attraction is definitely there.

Woohoo!

But how can you tell if you're racing ahead, and merely acting like you're half of a new couple...

...when the reality is that you're still just dating and getting to know each other?

Well, for tomorrow I will continue with some Relationship advice for men, so stay there!

Dating Tips Q&A: How to increase a woman's desire in you

You are a saint. A giant among insects... Ok, maybe not, but it gets through the obligatory ass- kissing since you have helped me so much. Let me begin...

I’ve had my eyes on this particular girl for quite some time, and I could tell she was already into me quite a bit, but we had never made anything of it. Last week, she decided to "be bold" and ask ME out, instead of the other way around (you can see I’m already doing something right). She asked if I wanted to go see a movie some time; instead of freaking out and jumping at the chance, I said I’m rather tired of this whole ‘movie date’ thing. If she wanted to get me, she was going to have to be a little more creative. She was rather shocked and felt somewhat rejected. Later in the conversation, we were got to talking about this stalker (wussy who needs a life) that seems to be in love with her, and she hates him. He had asked her if she wanted to accompany him to a football game the next night that they both were already going to.

She said she really wished that I would come with her so this guy would leave her alone.

I thought, "Ok. This will be my good deed for the year." and said I would go. She ends up driving me to the game. Upon arrival, she just HAD to braid her hair, and asked me to wait around while she did so. I stood there for a second, and then walked off. She started yelling at me to wait; I simply replied, "I'll see you inside the gate." waved and walked off. Once inside, I didn’t see her come in, but soon felt someone grab my butt (it was her).

We went on into the stadium, she soon saw someone she knew and went to talk to them, dragging me along. I stood around for a second, then wandered off, since I had seen someone I knew as well. She comes to find me soon, and we go off to our seats.

Her stalker had seen us as we were going to our seats
and decided to stay with us for part of the night.

She began talking to him, and I did my own thing. I wandered off numerous times throughout the night and generally acted very secure and like I didn’t need a thing in the world (especially her!). Following the game, as we walked back to her car I could tell that she wanted me badly due to some things she had been saying. She drove me back to where my car was waiting and we talked for twenty minutes or so in her car. There was some hand holding and such going on during the conversation. She said, "You know we're just going to end up making out—you’re just delaying the inevitable." Bingo. I shrugged it off, and we continued talking. About ten minutes later, she said, "It’s getting late; I really should be getting home." Obviously a ploy to get things started, as it was only 10:15 PM. I shrugged it off, again. A few minutes pass, and she says, "It's late, I really need to go." I say, "Alright." I open the door and get out of the car.

She says, "Where are you going?" I reply nonchalantly, "I just don’t think you want it badly enough yet." Score #2. I walk off to my car; she immediately jumps out of the car and begins walking to my car as well. I get to the car and put the key in the door and she sticks her leg in front of the door with this defiant attitude. I say, "You know, I've never been raped in an empty parking lot before..."

You can imagine what went on from there…

Thanks Dave.

Now, on to the questions: First, now that I’ve used my best line ever ("I just don’t think you want it badly enough yet."), do you have any suggestions on what to do and say next time to create that same anticipation/desire in her?

Also, you always say that I need to be the first to end the conversation, but many of the girls that I am interested in are somewhat sporadic and tend to call, IM, etc. when they don’t have a lot of time. Quite often, they are the ones to end the conversation before I have a chance to. How do I take this? Should I just reply, "Alright. I’ll catch you later." Acting like I could care less?

D. Knoxville, TN

>>>MY COMMENTS:

Great story.

I'm sure that anyone reading this would say "Yea, but she already liked you"... I wish you would have told the story from the beginning, because I'll bet you MADE her like you with more of the same type communication that you described here.

The one thing that you clearly understand here is how SEXUAL TENSION works.

You understand how to take a small spark of desire from her and AMPLIFY it until it's literally EXPLOSIVE.

If you keep amplifying and letting the tension build with a particular woman, this is the kind of result you'll get... and she will LOVE you for it.

Bravo!

Things like making her come up with a more "interesting" date idea, walking away from her when other guys would have clung to her, shrugging off her comments about the two of you getting together, etc. are the magic ingredients.

Most guys DESTROY all the sexual tension at every possible opportunity... they take every chance they can to SCREW THINGS UP, because they don't know better...

The fact is that most men just don't UNDERSTAND how women get turned on.

And most men don't understand that if you really want a woman to WANT you, then you NEED to get her turned on. It's not going to happen by itself.

Here's another interesting aspect of that thing called ATTRACTION:

The bigger the challenge you are, and the more intense the sexual tension, the more aroused a woman will become... so that when you finally do connect physically it's pure electricity.

Again, most men can't HANDLE sexual tension.
They feel uncomfortable when the situation isn't "clear cut", and they screw things up.

One of the things you mentioned doing was "shrugging off" her obvious "come ons" to you.

This kind of thing makes no sense to most guys.

But it makes sense to me.

And it made a LOT of sense to HER.

When a woman throws out a sexual comment, etc.
most guys screw it up. That's because they don't know the SECRET about these types of comments.

When you're a major challenge, it naturally means that she's not IN CONTROL of the situation.

Attractive women are USED to being in control, so when they're NOT in control, they get agitated.
It really bothers them.

So they TEST. They use all kinds of interesting tricks and tactics to see if you're just FAKING like you're actually in control of yourself and the situation.

One of the most obvious tests is throwing out a sexual comment.

She might mention that she loves sex, or that she thinks you guys have a chance of "hooking up", or some other "tease".

But make no mistake about it, these comments are not at all the innocent remarks that they appear to be.

She's watching VERY closely to see if you'll take the bait.

It's a woman's last resort when she feels like she isn't controlling the situation to see if you'll crumble to SOMETHING. -- If you say something like "Really? You think we're going to hook up? That would be cool" she KNOWS SHE'S IN CONTROL.

If you say "Yea, you think so? I don't know, I'm not that easy..." then it just dials up the tension, mystery, and challenge.

OK, so you've asked me a couple of questions as well...

What should you do NEXT time you see her to keep the tension building...?

Well, if something works, KEEP DOING IT.

If she enjoyed it the first time, do it again.

This time wait a little longer. Make her think about it a little bit more.

Women LOVE anticipation. They love to feel the rush that something is going to happen... but not know WHEN.

If you REALLY want to take things to the next level, take a page from popular movies and romance novels.

Don't just kiss her. Kiss her PASSIONATELY.

Pull her body into yours as you kiss her.

Then push her away and say "You're bad!".

Stop for awhile. Make her think about it. Then start again when she isn't expecting it.

These are the types of things that make women think about you all the time when you're gone...
and call you in the middle of the night because they want to see you. Really.

Most men are so damn BORING when it comes to this stuff! They do NOTHING to make a woman FEEL the powerful feelings that she's always wanted to feel.

You be the one to do it, and you'll be the one she always wants around.

Your second question was about ending calls and conversations first.

The REASON why you should end all conversations and other interactions with women first is that it conveys a clear message:

"I'M A BUSY GUY. I HAVE A LIFE."

It turns YOU into the one that's desirable.

Most guys cling, and try to keep a woman on the phone for a long time. They desire a woman's attention and approval, and they make it clear that this is what they're after.

Of course, this only demonstrates pure WEAKNESS to an attractive woman.

And weakness (or Wussness) isn't ATTRACTIVE.

If you run into a woman who's always on the run, don't let it get to you. To put it differently, don't become obsessed with her just because she's never available!

The answer is to just take things to the next level.

Here's a GREAT little technique...

An amazing and simple way to handle this kind of thing is to just say "OK, bye" without any other comments.

She says "I have to go, my friends are waiting for me outside". Just say "OK, bye" and SHUT UP.

80% of the time, she'll say "No, wait! I'm just really busy, call me in a few days" etc.

You can't "kind of" do this.

You have to be READY.

She's TESTING you by playing hard to get. It's a game. Have fun with it.

As soon as she says "I have to go, my laundry is in the dryer", you SHOOT back "OK, bye" in a VERY abrupt tone and SHUT UP.

It will create a funny, uncomfortable silence for just a second.

Most of the time, she'll say something in a tone of voice that says "That was weird", and then she'll give some kind of explanation or ask you why you were so short with her.

Of course, this is a great opportunity to bust her balls and create some fun banter.

Again, you'll often have her say something like "I'm really busy right now. I'm sorry. Call me tomorrow and let's do something". At this point, you can say "Yea, if you're lucky. Bye!".

Not cold. Not mean. Just short and to the point.

Then, when you call her next, it was HER that asked for the call.

You get to call up and say "Well, last time we talked you were begging me to call you... and I felt so bad for you that I finally broke down".

What we're talking about here is DESIRE... and more importantly, INCREASING IT.

In most interactions with women there is an opportunity to SPARK the chemistry... the sexual tension... the desire... and then there are many opportunities to AMPLIFY that desire.

But here's the BAD news:

If you do not understand all of the little steps from the first meeting to the bedroom, and know exactly how to smoothly progress from one step to the next, then you're going to keep failing with women.

It's that simple.

If you DO understand all of the steps, and you know EXACTLY what to do in order to smoothly transition from one to the next, then you are MUCH more likely to succeed.

One of the most IMPORTANT steps is controlling your own emotions. If you're nervous and freaked out, then you'll make her nervous.

We humans can SMELL fear and nervousness... and women are the best at it.

If you'd like to get an ADVANCED education in how to control your own emotions...

...and how to spark ATTRACTION, and how to go from one step to the next smoothly, then I recommend you check out my eBook, "Double Your Dating".

What makes it so great?

Two things:

1) It's easy to understand and use IMMEDIATELY.

2) It "feels right". In other words, you'll learn how to use the natural dynamics in any situation to make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you... without having to MANIPULATE her "secretly".

As you learn the concepts and techniques and begin to use them in situations with women, you will see women LIGHT UP in front of you.

You'll IMMEDIATELY notice the different way that they respond to your comments.

You'll begin to see all of the reasons why you failed in the past, and you'll understand the "one right thing" to do in each situation... so that you move FORWARD and stay in control of the situation.

Most of all, it will give you the CONFIDENCE to attract the kinds of women that most men only dream about dating.

I'm telling you, I used to have no clue about attracting women... but now that I do, I can date any type of women I want. And it's a damn good feeling.


In some of my next post I wil write small story dedicated to mans on about how to get your ex back when she walk away.

The Farmer Wants a Wife

After hearing word that the Australian reality TV show The Farmer Wants a Wife was must-see dating television, I decided to take a peek earlier this evening. I was quickly hooked: a couple of hours later I'd already managed to watch all six episodes. I found the show was not only surprising in its humanity, but also in how meeting someone, dating relationships and the issues they pose are similar no matter where you live.

The premise of The Farmer Wants a Wife is simple: six single, full-time farmers are looking for long term relationships via the show. Women were invited to apply for the show via the Australian website, and of those who put themselves up for grabs, the farmers chose ten to meet in person. An hour or so later and a bunch of speed dates under their belt, the men are asked to whittle the list down to five each. After a group date the numbers are further reduced to two, and these women are invited back to the individual Romeos' farms for a 10-day farming "vacation".

Almost immediately upon arriving, chemistry and attraction come into play. One couple in particular fell head over heels in love almost instantly, and instead of creating a tear-filled and drama-laden show, the obviously third-wheel women quietly leave the farms early, wishing the lovebirds farewell and many good intentions. Not only were the women who chose to leave a breath of fresh air, but I found them to be excellent, upstanding role models for women around the world. Either there was a connection or there wasn't, and those who felt the special spark had no issue going with their hearts, and those who didn't were cheerful if sad upon leaving. If The Farmer Wants a Wife intention was to honor courtship at its core through an entertaining and very public television show, the original Australian version definitely succeeded.

The show was also realistic, and not everyone fell hard or was treated kindly. One gent in particular rubbed me the wrong way from the get-go; he seemed disingenuous to me, and I felt badly for the women he chose. Not surprisingly, this guy created more drama than all of the other participants combined by dropping bomb after bomb throughout all six episodes, leaving several women hurt and confused as to why he'd even come on the show in the first place.

Series Two of the Australian series is already in the works, and the Americanized spinoff just started airing last week. Unfortunately, the US show seems more like a reality TV version of Nicole Ritchie's The Simple Life than anything (to me), losing the freshness, spirit, integrity and hope of the Australian original.

Dating work mate: learn when not to say anything

dating tips Relationships: Puzzles?
I got attracted to a woman and cannot control my feelings for her. I shouldn't get involved with single woman as I'm already married. I actually look forward to going to work, just knowing I will see her all day. I know I sound like I have a high school crush, but I can't stop thinking about him.
I fantasize about him all the time. Even wild dreams about him.
Dating work mate: learn when not to say anything
“ Puzzles and Answers ”

Are you capable to control your feelings

You may not be able to control your feelings, but you can and should control your behavior, because you're married, and you are at work.
Everyone has an agenda, everyone has needs and wants. When you are genuinely interested in someone you're ravenous about finding out how their mind works, much more than finding out how they can fit into fulfilling your own desires.

Go out of your way to meet new people

My advice is: enjoy your fantasies, because your fantasies are not hurting anybody. It sounds to me as if you are really hoping for more out of this, and you shouldn't be.
There should be no reason you're trying to “ figure her out ” . Do not embarrass yourself by trying to get to know her better, or calling her.

Try to look your best and keep your dignity

Bottom line: I've seen men do occasionally flirt on the job. Each time, they looked like fools, and no one would tell them, but would whisper about it. Each time, the woman was flattered, but was not interested.
So, enjoy your fantasies if they make you feel good, but don't try to act upon them. She is just a good-looking woman, nothing more, nothing less. To keep your dignity, leave it at that. For more tips about dealing with work romance, refer to e-books in series “ Relationships: Puzzles and Answers ” :
Get an inside look at what you will learn:
  • Are you capable to control your feelings?
  • Go out of your way to meet new people.
  • Try to look your best and keep your dignity.
More about this You will find on this great resource, caled free online relationship advice.

Tips For Teen For Creative Dating

Make a picnic - Pack a basket of your favorite foods, pick a great spot and have a picnic.
Go see a movie - Inviting someone to a movie is always interesting. One good way to make it a little interesting is to let your date choose the film, or put a bunch of movie names in a hat and pick one at random when you get together.
Plan a sporty activity - Take advantage of the time of year and enjoy a seasonal activity together. For example, rollerblade on a summer afternoon or ice skating on a winter night can make for a great date!
Drive to the beach - Take a drive down to the beach for the day. No matter what the time of year, a walk in the sand is always a refreshing change.
Be volunteer in a community service – If it is a project that you are both interested you could do together. Lending a helping hand to a good cause is always a satisfying way to spend an afternoon or evening.
Head to the city for a day - From seeing a matinee to shopping or viewing a great art exhibit, you should select what you are interested.
Make a great plan – You could get tickets to a game and cheer for your favorite team or go to an amusement park for the day.

Top 10 Dating Tips


I thought I would bring you the top 10 dating tips I have gathered along the way in the hope of assisting and enlightening those who need assistance. If you are new to the dating scene, a regular or just simply someone trying to meet someone new there should always be time for top dating tips, advice, information and things to consider. None of us are dating experts otherwise we would have a magic formula to present to others. And no, looks are not the magic formula otherwise all supermodels would be blissfully happy - which they are not my friend. Good looking people the world over struggle when it comes to affairs of the heart. Think of all the major figures in history who have fallen in matters of romance.
The truth is, there are no magic formulas, no perfect tricks of the trade, no cunning ways of trapping Mr. or Miss Right and no top dating tips that wave a magic wand. But there are some essential facts that you should always bear in mind along the way. Dating tips are just that - tips, they are not promises written in stone and different things will always work differently for different people. However, I have noticed that there are some threads of advice that keep cropping up and therefore it is worth reiterating my top 10 tips here.
My Top 10 Dating Tips
  • Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, decide who you are looking for, do your research and be ready to commit to dating. Half heartedness won't work. Also prepare for some let downs along the way but don't take dating too seriously either.
  • Get your act together. Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a 3 day diet. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself.
  • Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look. Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't go overboard and look like someone you are not but maybe its time to throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. People appreciate appearance.
  • Have a good think about what your dating goals are and timescales. Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.
  • Sort out your confidence levels in advance. By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Do all the things that will boost your confidence from avoiding negative friends (often the married ones) to attending the right kind of social functions. Couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.
  • Choose those you have a good chance of dating, don't aim low but do aim realistically. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous then good for you, but be prepared and be realistic about your chances.
  • Work out in advance where in your neighborhood you are likely to meet people and join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups, anything where you are likely to meet potential partners. The kind of partners you are looking for. I know its a cliché but you will not meet people by staying indoors.
  • Take time off from dating occasionally if its not going well or causing dating fatigue. Dating is an ongoing process and so recharging the batteries and keeping the confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. So date in phases if necessary.
  • Enjoy dating for what it is, dating. It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not bring you a sparkle. The fact is, most people are interesting and whilst you may not be out there looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.
  • Never ever make yourself too available. People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. In keeping with this do not sleep with your dates early on if you want them to progress, so keep sex until later. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. Peak too early and you have little left to offer and emotions may never have had the time to develop. And of course give flowers and don't forget some great Valentine's Day gift.

Searching to go for a date with some one special

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Dating For Teenagers

Being a teenager is hard enough without worrying about dating right?

Dating for teenagers can be a very scary thing when you first go through it but there are some things that you can do to help you get a date and to have fun when you go out.

1. Believe it or not, the hardest part of dating for a lot of teens is actually getting a date in the first place. You already have a lot to deal with on a daily basis and worrying about finding a date can just add to the stress.

It may be difficult to comprehend right now but there is plenty of time for dating over the coming years so try not to let it worry you. Just be yourself, go out with your friends and meet new people and you will probably find that potential dates will actually approach you.

2. When you do go out on a date it’s so important to be yourself.

A lot of people lose focus of this because they are trying so hard to impress the person they are with. There is no point pretending to be someone you are not because if anything does develop, your partner will soon get to know who you really are and any initial lies may come back to bite you!

3. If you do get up the courage to ask someone out don’t worry or feel bad if they say no. There are plenty of other people that would love to get to know you. Who’s to say that you won’t meet someone tomorrow who is a better match?

Everybody suffers rejection at some point in their life and if you let it discourage you then you will never end up asking anyone else out. At the end of the day it’s just one individual who said no. There are plenty of others at school or in your neighbourhood that might potentially be your soul mate and failing that, there are always online dating sites specifically aimed at teenagers.

One, two or even twenty rejections shouldn’t mean that you give up on finding that someone special.

4. Before asking someone on a date, make sure you practice what you want to say. You can do this in a mirror at home where nobody will know what you are doing if that makes it easier. It will really help you when you go to ask someone for a date and will mean you don’t end up stumbling and fluffing your words. The more you practice the easier it will.

This also applies when actually going on a date for the first time. Make a list of things that you can ask the other person when the conversation starts to dry up.

For help with conversation topics visit the Dating Tips section.

5. One of the most important things that you should remember about dating for teenagers is that you are not the only one that is nervous. The person that you are asking is probably just as nervous as you are so just bear that in mind and it should make finding a way to ask them a bit easier.

These are just a few of the things to help you with the daunting prospect of dating for teenagers. If you want more answers then feel free to look around the site at some of the articles in the other sections.

If you still can’t find what you are looking for then just Ask Sissy our resident columnist. She will do her best to reply to as many of your dating questions as possible and publish them on her pages so make sure you check back regularly to get your answers.

Improving Your Sex Drive

If you're looking for ideas to improve your sexual life or are a bit in the dark about matters of sex, we can help fulfill your desires and open doors to new experiences.


Kicking your sex life to a higher notch not only would do wonders to your partner, but also improves your health. As they say, a healthy body makes a healthy sex drive. Here are some great tips that you should follow.
Consider circulation-enhancing dishes – Foods that are high in Omega-3 fatty acids like mackerel, salmon, and wild salmon, make your nervous system function better, which in turn contributes to good circulation. Another good food to improve circulation is chilies, which also stimulates the nervous system. A healthy blood flow means that your genital area receives fresh blood that improve sexual ability and pleasure.
Go for granola – Improved circulation also means greater erectile response. To accomplish that, go for foods rich in L-Arginine like granola, oatmeal, peanuts, cashews, walnuts, dairy, green vegetables, root vegetables, garlic, ginseng, soybeans, chickpeas, and seeds. L-Arginine is helpful for improving sexual functions in men. Although there weren't studies yet connecting L-Arginine and women, remember that erectile response is not exclusive to guys as they have erections too in their clitoris and the tissue surrounding the vulva.
Try soy – Soy binds estrogen receptors, which helps the vaginal area remain lubricated and combats symptoms of menopause. It is also beneficial to the prostate, a crucial male sex organ. However, it's important to note that women who have a history of breast cancer should not eat large amounts of soy because it increases the risk of reoccurence.
Reduce weight – Foods that promote weight loss also has libido-boosting potential. Obese men tend to have erectile dysfunction and low testosterone. Reducing weight, in turn, results in an increase of testosterone, and thus an increase in sexual function.
Have the right amount of fat – Too much is bad for you, as well as too little fat because you need it to produce your hormones. Cholesterol is metabolized in the liver and you get your testosterone and estrogen, which you need for your sex drive. Monounsaturated and polyunsaturated fats are the “good kind” of fats that your body needs. Olive oil, salmon, and nuts are optimal sources.
Avoiding stress – Medical and hormonal problems are major contributors to sexual dysfunction and low libido, as well as too much stress, relationship difficulties, and psychological issue. Antidepressants like Prozac can negatively affect sex drive as well.
Do some cardio endurance – Shoot for 3 to 4 days of cardio execise like running, walking, swimming.
Muscular endurance – Conditioning your body can be a plus for longer lasting sex. For endurance, you will need to lift lighter weights for more repetitions.
Muscular strength – Your muscles will be contracting no matter what sexual position you are in, so it pays to shape to avoid nasty leg or foot cramps. To achieve this, lift heavier weights for few repetitions.
Flexibility – This can enhance anyone's sex life by making it a bit easier to get in your favorite position with a minimum amount of fuss. Try a little Yoga or some stretches to get you in the mood.

Top 10 Dating Tips

I thought I would bring you the top 10 dating tips I have gathered along the way in the hope of assisting and enlightening those who need assistance. Next time I will write you about how to Save your marriage, today dating tips for those who are still not in marriage. If you are new to the dating scene, a regular or just simply someone trying to meet someone new there should always be time for top dating tips, advice, information and things to consider. None of us are dating experts otherwise we would have a magic formula to present to others. And no, looks are not the magic formula otherwise all supermodels would be blissfully happy - which they are not my friend. Good looking people the world over struggle when it comes to affairs of the heart. Think of all the major figures in history who have fallen in matters of romance.

The truth is, there are no magic formulas, no perfect tricks of the trade, no cunning ways of trapping Mr. or Miss Right and no top dating tips that wave a magic wand. But there are some essential facts that you should always bear in mind along the way. Dating tips are just that - tips, they are not promises written in stone and different things will always work differently for different people. However, I have noticed that there are some threads of advice that keep cropping up and therefore it is worth reiterating my top 10 tips here.

My Top 10 Dating Tips

  • Get prepared for dating. If you really want to succeed in the dating game, decide who you are looking for, do your research and be ready to commit to dating. Half heartedness won't work. Also prepare for some let downs along the way but don't take dating too seriously either.

  • Get your act together. Begin a regime of looking your best. Join a gym, read health magazines, get fit and start a diet with some great diet tips. Get your hair cut or styled and begin a new regime of good grooming or beauty treatment. Though it will not find you a date in itself, you will feel a million times more confident about yourself.

  • Go shopping and treat yourself to new clothes and even a whole new look. Get your image right, one that you can manage and live with, but one that flatters you. Don't go overboard and look like someone you are not but maybe its time to throw out those tired jeans, old sweaters or cardigans and spruce yourself up. People appreciate appearance.

  • Have a good think about what your dating goals are and timescales. Do you see yourself married within 2 years? If you do then approach dating accordingly. If you are more laid back and don't take dating too seriously then ask yourself some honest questions about why you are dating and what you hope to achieve. If it is purely sex then ask yourself if you are about to be honest with those you hope to date.

  • Sort out your confidence levels in advance. By following the first four tips you will feel better and be more focused. Do all the things that will boost your confidence from avoiding negative friends (often the married ones) to attending the right kind of social functions. Couples at dinner parties in suburbia is not necessarily where you need to be right now.

  • Choose those you have a good chance of dating, don't aim low but do aim realistically. In other words, your dating is based on the whole package you present as well as just your personality. If you are looking for a glamour girl or boy and want to date someone trendy and gorgeous then good for you, but be prepared and be realistic about your chances.

  • Work out in advance where in your neighborhood you are likely to meet people and join clubs, societies, sports events, drama groups, anything where you are likely to meet potential partners. The kind of partners you are looking for. I know its a cliché but you will not meet people by staying indoors.

  • Take time off from dating occasionally if its not going well or causing dating fatigue. Dating is an ongoing process and so recharging the batteries and keeping the confidence and optimism levels high is an absolute must. So date in phases if necessary.

  • Enjoy dating for what it is, dating. It is meeting people and socializing and spending time in the company of stimulating individuals who may or may not bring you a sparkle. The fact is, most people are interesting and whilst you may not be out there looking for new friends, you may well find one or two fabulous people along the way.

  • Never ever make yourself too available. People like mystery and enigma and the thrill of the chase when dating. In keeping with this do not sleep with your dates early on if you want them to progress, so keep sex until later. The longer a person is made to chase and fall for you within reason, the more likely that love may blossom. Peak too early and you have little left to offer and emotions may never have had the time to develop.

Where to go on the First Date - Plan

If on your first phone call you decide to ask a prospect out on the date, you should already in advance have figured out potential dating locations and times and plan for a short hour date. You should arrange to meet in a place where you can easily leave after an hour if things don't go well. That rules out dinner; besides, do you really want to pay an expensive dinner for someone who you've never even met before?

(A) Kind of location. If you like to drink (glug glug glug!) a bar is a good location, and you can leave at any time. If you don't like to drink, coffee places are fine too. Note that some women may be turned off by coffee places, because they aren't fancy-fancy enough, but coffee places are good because (i) they are well lit so you can see who you are with (ii) they are reasonably quiet so you can hear who you are with and (iii) if a woman is turned off by a coffee place because it isn't fancy-fancy enough, you don't have to waste any more time with her.

(B) Location. You should choose a place roughly halfway between where you live/work and she lives/works. If you choose a location near yourself, she will think you're inconsiderate; if you choose a location near her, she may think you're too eager and/or a pushover.

(C) Timing. Arrange to meet for an hour after work sometime during the week. Not a Friday or Saturday night. For now, you want your prospect to think you are busy during these times.

Her reaction:
(A) She agrees. Then you're all set.

(B) She says she's busy for the next week; why don't you try her again next week?
It's possible for a person to be busy for an entire week... but unlikely, especially for only an hour's date. If she's "busy" for an entire week, it's a stalling tactic; she's seeing someone else (probably multiple people), and is trying to stretch things out; chances are if you call her next week she'll be busy then too.

(C) She agrees IN PRINCIPAL to the date, but says you must call the morning of the date to confirm. Nothing wrong with that, is there? After all, busy people with unpredictable schedules don't always know when they'll be available, right? Unfortunately, this is usually not the truth. The reason women ask you to confirm the "day of" is that they're really not interested in going out with you. They want to spend the next few days finding out if they can find someone else to date; only if they can't will they agree, at the last minute, to go out with you. They want you to keep that time available in case they decide to go out with you, and you'll find out their decision at the last minute. Whether they go out with you or not, the fact that you already rank so low in her list of priorities mean that any date you have with her will automatically fail; therefore, if she will not set a concrete date and time that doesn't require last minute confirmation, she's not really interested.
If she calls you back to cancel the date after you've arranged it, that almost always means she's not interest. Almost always. The exception is if she immediately wants to reschedule for another day within a few days thereafter. Her exact excuse (work, sick puppy, laundry) is unimportant; all the matters is whether she wants to reschedule on the spot for a concrete date. If she doesn't, or if she says vaguely "Let's talk next week", don't bother.

Online internet profile essay

First, you have to pick a dating service. Once you do so, you have to write about yourself, or create what's commonly called a online dating profile.






The most important:


1) Make sure you correctly indicate whether you are married or single, and whether or not you have children or want children. Ideally you should be single and say you want to meet someone for marriage and children. If you don't check these things off, you won't meet anyone. Make sure you also check off a profession, and list a body type (slender and/or athletic if possible, never "average") and height.






2) The Intro paragraph. After your photo, this is the most important thing, your main paragraph where you write something about yourself. The key to remember is that people aren't usually selected because of their intro paragraph, but they are often rejected because of it. That's why the strategy of writing the same bland generic things that most other people are writing "I am happy nice and friendly and good with my family" is usually best. If you're a man, women will probably only look at your photo, your height, body type, and profession in deciding whether to contact you. If you're a woman, men will probably only look at your photo, your body type, and maybe your profession in deciding whether to contact you. Your intro paragraph can help, but only slightly, and really only has a potential to hurt you if you write something that potential dates don't like (your politics... your hobbies... your attitudes....). If you have the same general interests as everyone else (eating, drinking, movies), I strongly recommend you go with the bland intro paragraph--write about vague general interests that couldn't possibly offend anyone else and what a nice person you are. You won't stand out, but more importantly you won't offend.


Although I've just recommended going with the bland intro paragraph, there's an exception to this rule: if you don't have the same general interests as everyone else, the bland profile won't work for you. Most people like eating, drinking, museums, and movies. If these aren't your top interests, if these bore you to tears, you're going to have to be honest about your real interests. If you don't, you're only going to attract people who will want to do what you consider to be boring things, and you'll have nothing in common to talk about. A common falsehood is that people with totally unrelated interests can be attracted to each other--well, perhaps this is true of people trapped together on desert islands for months at a time. But people attempting to start a conversation with total strangers need at least something in common. So if you really don't like the typical interests (excessive eating, drinking, drowsy movies, etc.) of most people, you'll need to list your real interests--they will cut down on the responses you receive, but the responses will be more relevant.


I remember I once had a generic profile ("I am nice and like to be nice to the nice"), and I attracted a lot of women and had a lot of dates--most of which were totally incompatible, and it became very frustrating to go on one bad date after another. Then I retooled my profile to specifically list my interests (mine were unusual--excessive eating and boozing were not on the very top of the list), and found the matches I attracted, though fewer in number, were a little more compatible.


The most important thing about your intro paragraph is that you sound friendly and upbeat! No one wants to date someone who is bitter or a sad sack. Make sure you spike your profile in at least 2 places with the stock phrases how nice you are and how you like to laugh. It will sound somewhat insincere to the sophisticated few but at the same time most people will think you friendly, which is important, especially to women.


Also, don't say negative things. "Not looking for someone with an attitude" "I am very picky!" "Not looking to play games" "Don't want anyone who lives near anyone who voted for Bush" are some of the common ones I've seen. Even if you don't want to meet these kinds of people, you shouldn't write it. Writing such thing make you sound cranky, and bitter. Don't list your don'ts. You'll have to do your filtering yourself, in choosing whom to respond to.


In addition to the intro essay your dating service may request other essays (such as your idea of a first date, your interests, most recent books read, etc.) but as long as you don't say anything offensive, it doesn't really matter what you write--the less the better, actually, as the more you write, the more you have the potential to offend. You never know what can offend people or what people will think of your attitudes or interests. What may seem normal to you (such as race car driving or skiing from a helicopter) may seem redneckish or reckless to others. After the intro paragraph, say as little as possible and say what you say in generalities. Think like a politician.






The unimportant:


1) When filling out your profile, there are things that are more important, and less important. The checkbox options where you check off your hobbies and interests are the least important--most people check off a lot of them, and no one tends to pay any attention to them, so don't worry about what you check, as long as you check a few, to make yourself look "well rounded". I don't know how many women had checked "hiking" In their profile when the longest hike they went on was to their local supermarket.


There's also often a section where you're asked to list your income. Don't answer this one. Too low and you'll drive women away; too high and you'll only attract gold diggers. If they only want you for money, you're not going to have a lasting relationship .

Welcome to your Online School of Dating

Here, you will learn about many aspects of dating, flirting, seduction, romance, love, relationships and related topics. Remember to work on all the things you will find here and what you learn from books and other sources. All things are INTER-RELATED. Mastering one thing is not the solution. Getting better at LOTS of different skills and attitudes is what works the best. Becoming WHO YOU REALLY ARE is the answer. When you do that, you will attract the person of your dreams. Good Luck ! (However, luck matters very little in the game of dating... all that matters is your WAY OF APPROACH and your ATTITUDE ;-) )

I dedicate my success with girls to this ebook called Double your dating. If you are kinda confused about what WORKS and what NOT, I would recommend you to GET this ebook immediately - where each and every aspect of "handling girls" is outlined in simple steps. It was a life savor for me and changed my entire approach on how I used to act with girls. And, once you start to screw the girls (:P) after reading this ebook, don't forget to say thanks to me!!!

Get your focus right - For instant energy/confidence

How you feel in any given moment is linked to:

* What you are focussing on
* The way that you are moving and using your body
* The language you are using

Your mind controls all three! And you control your mind.

If you are feeling lethargic or need an instant confidence/energy boost just remember that you can change the way that you feel by changing the above 3 points.

Change what you are thinking about and you will change your attitude and confidence.

Always remember: YOU are in control of how you think and feel - no one else on earth has this power unless you give it away. Take control of your attitude, and you take control of your results.

Introducing of Online Dating

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online-dating-super-profile.jpgIt is easy to see why online dating has become so popular, as you are able to meet someone anywhere in the world from the comfort of your own computer. Before you make the decision to join an online dating website, it is important for you to take a number of factors into consideration. You will first want to think about how successful you’ve been with offline dating. If you have found a reasonable amount of success doing this, it may be strange for you to meet someone on a website.

online-dating-moment.jpgHowever, if you’re a shy person who has tried unsuccessfully to meet someone offline, or you’re a loner who wants to meet someone without the hassles of going to clubs, concerts, or bars, the internet may be an excellent tool for you. Much like offline dating, being successful with online dating requires you to follow a number of guidelines. My first piece of advice is to invest money in a webcam. A webcam is a critical tool for anyone who wants to be successful with online dating. The reason I say this is because it allows you to actually see the person you are contacting, and you can make sure they are who they say they are. While photos are helpful, they can be old, altered, or simply fake.

online-dating-moments.jpgEach online dating site will allow users to list information in their profile. My advice to you is to avoid sending messages to people who do not have a lot of information in their profiles. More often than not, people who do not have detailed profiles are not truly interested in trying to find a partner. You may also find it helpful to use paid sites compared to sites that are free. When you use paid sites, you will often find that there is a better selection, and the members are serious about finding a date, since they are paying a monthly membership to be on the website.

online-dating-super-profiles.jpgIt should also be common sense to avoid responding to profiles that do not even have pictures. If the person is unwilling to post their picture in their profile, this generally means that they have something to hide, and you should avoid them at all costs. Once you have found someone online that you’re interested in, you should never meet them in person unless it is in a public place with either your family member or friend present.

100% Free Online Dating Websites

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online-dating-top-website.jpgMany of the singles using online dating have problems with paying to find a date. 100% free online dating websites fight against psychological issue that some people have when they feel like they would be buying a date. Well let me tell you that this is not the case at all. First of all you need to have a check on the Internet and see what dating sites show high in ratings.

online-dating-super-website.jpgMention should be made of the fact that at a specific level we can talk in terms of 100% free online dating websites about any standard page offering dating services. How come? Well, first of all, trial membership is what they all offer, as part of promotion campaigns. The only thing you have to do is register as a user, post a profile and look for a date according to your own preferences, without paying for a specific period of time.

online-dating-super-guide.jpgOne thing that should be considered is that few 100% free online dating sites give you access to professional counseling for instance. There are usually funny articles with tips that you find available on such sites, but you can’t rely on those pieces of advice to rule your love life. Take everything with a grain of salt, just like in the dating as such. If you need advice it’s better to turn to pros.

online-dating-free-website.jpgIf you’re curious about the ratings a 100% free online dating website gets, remember that there are lots of testimonials on such pages with the stories of people who have made a cyber-date their first step together in life. Of course, there are fake testimonials too, the site may be putting up some happy love stories. However, you can always check them, particularly those that leave contact data.

online-dating-web.jpgCyberDating.com is one highly appreciated 100% free online dating website. It’s entirely depends on advertising to make money, and you could really help them if you use their services, particularly during the times when they ask for sponsors’ support. The system they use resembles that of televisions that cover their costs and get their profit from commercials. The great thing with this site is that you don’t even have to become a member, all you need to do is post a free profile and start sending messages.

online-dating-super-websites.jpgLast but not least, we should also touch upon personal security with 100% free online dating sites. Remember that privacy is the key word in Internet communication. You keep yours and so does your date. Make sure you take care of your best interest by not revealing any direct personal information to your online date. There is no site that would guarantee information about a one of its members; that part is entirely your business and responsibility.

What Makes Online Dating So Great?

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online-dating-popular-websites.jpgOnline dating, BTW I am proffering: plentyoffish dating or myspace dating is a great way to meet new people in a number of ways and is considered to be the best way to do it by many but a lot of people simply don’t know why these services are considered to be so great, I am going to tell you why these services are so great and hopefully it will inspire you to take the opportunity to use the online dating services and enjoy them too.
online-dating-popular-website.jpgYou can get to know someone very well before you ever meet them. This is an excellent advantage of online dating, you can actually find out a lot about someone and really get to know who they are, what they like and basically anything you may want to know about them before you ever meet them in person, you can feel as though you know someone before you ever actually meet them. This is great because it can make meeting someone much more comfortable and safe and really make it go much smoother.
online-dating-popular-guides.jpgYou can meet many, many people all at once and from the comfort of your own home. When you go out to a social place like a bar, you can only talk with one person at a time and for all you know, the perfect person from you could be in the other side of the bar, well this is not a problem with online dating as you can talk with multiple people at the same time and you can also meet literally hundreds of people in just one week.
online-dating-popular-tips.jpgYou can meet people with much more confidence. Some people have a problem talking with people they have just met, they maybe do not feel like they are interesting or they are not confident enough to hold a good conversation, well, with online dating you can talk with people in the safe environment of your home and there is no pressure like there is when you are standing in front of someone. It is much easier to talk with someone on a computer and would more than likely give you the confidence to say things and talk comfortably unlike how you would face to face.
online-dating-popular-guide.jpgThere doesn’t have to be that nervous introduction. You know when you see someone you would like to talk to and you really want to be introduced to them in some way but you don’t know how to go about it, that is not a problem with online dating, most of the services will require you to create a profile in which you would tell people who you are and a bit about yourself and that is your introduction, people just come along and read your profile and they instantly know who you are and a little about you, then all that’s required is to strike up a conversation.

Be Apart Of Online Dating

It is easy to see why online dating has become so popular, as you are able to meet someone anywhere in the world from the comfort of your own computer. However, online dating may not be for everyone. Before you make the decision to join an online dating website, it is important for you to take a number of factors into consideration. You will first want to think about how successful you’ve been with offline dating. If you have found a reasonable amount of success doing this, it may be strange for you to meet someone on a website.

online-dating-top-profile.jpg

However, if you’re a shy person who has tried unsuccessfully to meet someone offline, or you’re a loner who wants to meet someone without the hassles of going to clubs, concerts, or bars, the internet may be an excellent tool for you. Much like offline dating, being successful with online dating requires you to follow a number of guidelines. My first piece of advice is to invest money in a webcam. A webcam is a critical tool for anyone who wants to be successful with online dating. The reason I say this is because it allows you to actually see the person you are contacting, and you can make sure they are who they say they are. While photos are helpful, they can be old, altered, or simply fake.

online-dating-top-tips.jpg

Each online dating site will allow users to list information in their profile. My advice to you is to avoid sending messages to people who do not have a lot of information in their profiles. More often than not, people who do not have detailed profiles are not truly interested in trying to find a partner. You may also find it helpful to use paid sites compared to sites that are free. When you use paid sites, you will often find that there is a better selection, and the members are serious about finding a date, since they are paying a monthly membership to be on the website.

online-dating-top-guide.jpg

It should also be common sense to avoid responding to profiles that do not even have pictures. If the person is unwilling to post their picture in their profile, this generally means that they have something to hide, and you should avoid them at all costs. Once you have found someone online that you’re interested in, you should never meet them in person unless it is in a public place with either your family member or friend present.